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No Matter How Devastated You Feel, You Are Held

In a world where we are obsessed with power and control – with us trying to control almost everything, including things like death – one of the toughest things to encounter is the unknown. Or rather the end of the known.

There will certainly be moments in our life when each of us would stand at the edge of our knowledge staring at the unknown. You would know for sure that you can’t take a step back, yet would have no clue about where to place the next one. In those moments of utter helplessness, moments that demand vulnerability, moments when your mind shoots questions for which no one has answers, be willing to not know, to stumble, to bow before the unknown.

For some of us, these might be the most terrifying moments in our life. But trust me, once you walk through them, you will realize that these are the moments that help you connect to yourself, to something beyond you and to life – beyond logic, plans, and deadlines.

If you’re confused and don’t know how you’re going to move forward, worry not, my friend. Life always has a plan for you. All it takes from your side is to listen to its voice. If you can’t hear it yet, you soon will. Till then, you need to have a little faith and a lot of patience.

You don’t have to make sense of this unknown. You don’t have to buy into your mind’s story of what the unknown looks like, what your future looks like. It will try all its tricks to scare you, but don’t fall for them. Let the unknown remain unknown until it reveals itself before you.

Your pain, your sorrow, your doubts, your fears, and all those unnameable emotions you are feeling right now, they are all here to serve you. They are here to bring you closer to yourself. They are here to guide you home. They are your friends. The friends who are least understood. They have shown the courage to confront you, for your good, despite all your resistance towards them. For once, listen to what they are here to convey.

If you are worried that you will break, remember, it is rigid that breaks. If you are worried that you won’t be able to hold yourself up, remember, you have held yourself together each time you fell apart. There is nothing for you to worry here, nothing for you to lose.

All that you fear, is your mind’s resistance to take you away from being present to your feeling. It is trying to save you from being broken, but at times you need to break to let the light come in. Just like the ground crumbles before a sapling shoots out, your stories need to break so that your inner power may come forth.

You just need to breathe deep, notice your thoughts and feelings as they try to project a future you don’t want to see. Know that what you see are just stories, and you need not fight them. They are far from reality. Your reality, for now, is what you feel in your body, the air you are breathing in and out of your lungs.

Even if you feel lost, hopeless and devastated, know that you are held. You are held by the earth and the sky, by the sun and the moon, by life and death. And you are loved deeply by the spirits of your ancestors.

Wake up from your sorrow, and look around for all those blessings you haven’t thanked the Universe for. Look out for all those friends who stood by you in tough times. The ones who believed in you even when you lost hope. Prepare yourself to welcome the light that’s knocking your door. Let it in, let it show you the path ahead. And always know that you are loved.

I’m willing to bet, the last smile will be yours.